this is a coconut shell, and i am it's frog

Wednesday, February 07, 2007
one day
A 9 year old kid with middle ear infection.

A 45 year old man with viral upper respiratory tract infection

An 87 year old, twice widowed lady, fighting depression and anxiety attacks, after realising she no longer has kids to care for.

A 20 year old guy smelling so stongly of weed I got a free high, wondering why he's feeling "on edge" lately. Gee, I wonder if it has anything to do with that stuff you're smoking?

35 year old man worried he might lose his job cause of an industrial accident. A circular saw went through 4 of 5 fingers on his right hand.

A 56 year old man so obese he's breathing heavily after the 10 steps from the waiting room to the examining room. "There's nothing wrong with my weight" he proclaims. "I drink about a case of beer a week, but it's not a problem" he continues.
I glance at his cholesterol profile. Take his blood pressure. 2 previous heart attacks, his chart says. He'll be lucky if he lives till 60.

16 year old girl, wanting to start birth control pills. "uhm..." is about all I manage before running for my staff doc.

37, 55, 23, 62 year old men, 18, 22, 45 year old women, viral URTI

17 year old girl, breaking down and crying in the office cause she just... can't... stop... hitting... coke... "I hate myself," she mumbles exasperatedly, before hiding her tear-streaked eyes in her hands. I fidget nervously.

2 year old girl, groin rash. Mom says - "I tried scrubbing her with one of those metal dishwashing things you know, to get the rash out". I try to hide my wide-eyed horror. I fail.

92 year old woman, "why am I feeling so lousy these days?" Could it be due to the fact that when you were a teenager, horses were still the main mode of transport?
"I know something's wrong with me, doctor. I don't want to die yet". I know what's wrong with you. It's called old age. She insists that I search through her 3-inch-thick chart full of specialist consults again for something wrong. All her tests describe abnormalities, but all end with the phrase "appropriate for age".
I sigh, roll my eyes, and start flipping.
"ohyeah, she's a bitch," the doctor I'm working with says after I emerge from the ordeal.

52 year old woman, unexplained anemia. aiyo, what am I missing? I hope to goodness it's nothing major.

67 year old man, oropharyngeal cancer, post-op follow-up. The surgeons broke his jaw in two, cut open half his face, removed half his tongue and all the cervical lymph nodes on his right, then fashioned him a new tongue from skin grafted from his forearm. The only sign of his 12-hour, face-splitting surgery is a thin scar that runs down the middle of his lower lip to his neck, across the clavicle, and up to the angle of his ear.
How bloody cool is THAT.
"I'm lucky," he says, as he winks at me.

23 year old lady, PAP smear + periodic breast exam. I run again.

85 year old man, "my old bones ache!!"

32 year old lady, going through a divorce, losing her home, her job and her kids. "I just need something for sleep." I hesitate.
"Prescribe only enough zopiclone for 14 days," the staff doc whispers after I ask him what I should do.
Even if she takes all at once, her liver should take the hit and the emergency docs will have time to react.

17 year old girl, wanting weight loss options. Her skin hangs on her bones like ragged old clothes, and her bones jut out unnaturally. She weighs 30 kilos. "I'm fat," she insists adamantly.

23 year old male, medical student, pretentious as ever. Sleep deprivation.
posted by theycallmecruel @ 11:04 AM   2 comments

    LIFE is like a glass of coke, it may seem full but it's actually just all froth.

wheeeeeeeeeee

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ribbit Chinaman in Canada, no more. i still can't come up with a better phrase.
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